Written by guest blogger Katherine Porfilio
“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances”. — Victor Frankl
The above quote was written by a prominent psychiatrist and neurologist who was arrested and sent to a Nazi concentration camp in 1942. Tragically, his parents and wife perished, but he, prisoner number 119104, lived. He wrote these words after his experiences in the camps and later went on to write, “Man’s Search for Meaning,” voted one of the most influential books in the U.S. by the Library of Congress in 1991.
Frankl also wrote, “it is a characteristic of the American culture that, again and again, one is commanded and ordered to ‘be happy.’ But happiness cannot be pursued; it must ensue. One must have a reason to ‘be happy.'”
Over 50 years later, the “pursuit of happiness” is still at the core of almost every endeavor. Google “how to be happy,” and you will receive 2,390,000,000 results. Search Amazon for “happiness books” and you’ll find enough books to keep you busy for the rest of your life.
Ironically, the fervid quest for happiness begets less happiness, increased dissatisfaction and an inability to appreciate life.
In a recent study, The Journal of Positive Psychology asked nearly 400 Americans whether or not they thought their lives had meaning and/or if they were happy. The researchers, examining attitudes toward meaning, stress, finances and having children found that although happiness and leading a meaningful life may seem synonymous, they are in fact, quite different. The psychologists ultimately found that leading a happy life is associated mostly with being a “taker” and leading a meaningful life corresponded with being a “giver.”
Perhaps we’ve had enough experience in life to know that this is true without having to read a study. Perhaps not. Either way, we all have to make a choice. What are we going to dedicate our lives to – the pursuit of happiness or leading a meaningful life?
In my experience, those who live to give, to help others, to add meaning, to bring joy, to make what they touch better, regardless of the circumstances they find themselves in and without concern to “find” happiness, are those who lead happy, fulfilling, meaningful lives.
Gregory Hake 
Yes, the whole thing is really strange to me. Science tries to define happiness by the sensations that come from a specific combination of neurochemicals, and then tries to recreate that through pharmaceutical wizardry. What this ultimately does though is deplete vital reserves, leaving one feeling more destitute and hopeless than ever before.
Whatever happened to the uplifting winds of living through virtue? Is it so ‘old-fashioned’ that it feels out of place in our modern sophistication? I for one say we need to reconsider things some and simplify our lives to the extent that we can remember what’s really important! At the core of that no doubt, is what is truly full of meaning – ones selfless purpose for living.
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I think that the reason that looking solely for happiness is the quickest way to lose is because happiness is directly tied to meaningfulness. We might think that spending our days lying on the beach would make us happy, but I think that most of us would find boredom more quickly than happiness.
The good news is that finding meaning is actually easier than finding happiness. As you said, all it requires is being a “giver”. There are very many things in this world that are worthy to spend our time on. Try asking “what can I offer here” rather than “how can I glean happiness from this scenario”.
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Love the post. Thank you for providing a womderful distillation of what actually brings happiness.
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Something that always amazes and delights me about nature is just how generous it is. Take a bean or tomato plant for instance, one little plant can feed a whole family time and time again throughout a summer, they just keep giving and giving and giving. Mankind however, has so often fallen into the nasty habit of giving only according to what they can get and actually thinking that, that is the smart thing to do, and children are raised on that basis. The sad thing is that giving to get, so effectively blocks what would naturally return to one, and one is consequently left with a constant void which man attempts to fill in countless ways. Life is naturally so incredibly generous and the return so abundant, so full of miracles and wonder that this fact alone is enough to inspire an attitude of deepest thankfulness. I find myself in that place this morning Kate, full of thankfulness for the Lord’s abundant generosity. Thank you for a great post!
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Learning the how to use our inticate equipment for its intended purpose will always result in greater achievement and more satisfactory results. Thank you for a crucial piece of information for our human being owners manual. Our optimal output is predicated on radiance, a shared flow and exchange of energy. Dr. Frankl’s observations were a gift. I appreciate you bringing them to light again.
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