Core of You

“Not till we are lost, in other words not till we have lost the world, do we begin to find ourselves, and realize where we are and the infinite extent of our relations.” – Henry David Thoreau, Walden

As much as you value your relationships, romantic or otherwise, you are wise to remember that they do not define you. You are not defined by what is without, but what is within. Your relationships are vital to your pursuit and experience of happiness, but your manhood or womanhood and the revelation of your inner identity do not hinge on them.

You were designed to love. To make yourself vulnerable to others to share that love is not weakness, but strength. As supportive, heartening and comforting as your friends, family, or true love may be, no amount of self-sacrifice or losing yourself in the arms and caresses of another will put you any closer to finding yourself.

Your identity is not relational, it is absolute. Cherish your relationships, but don’t make the mistake that so many have by trying to find yourself in them. Your identity is not in the midst of them, it is in the core of you, and that core is infinitely precious. Nurture, honor and reveal the wonderful one within, that is, the very core of you, and you will soon realize who you are, where you are, and how special your relationship is to all that truly matters.

7 thoughts on “Core of You

  1. Ernest

    It is my experience that the value of our relationships is limited until we discover the greatness that is inherent within each of us. When we do than we can be of genuine value to others, and also in a position to genuinely receive and appreciate the value of others.


  2. Joshua

    We have become upside down and bass ackwards.
    Each ones core is 100% in agreement with every other, to know this, it must be viewed from inside – out.
    We get tripped up on the outside in, which makes up 1% of the problem.
    That measly 1% is the cause of the whole mess.
    Let us be still enough to identify the switch, and flip it once and for all.
    For we cannot give what we do not have. Once we have it, it becomes far easier for those to whom we are connected to get it.
    The odds are, ever in our favour!


  3. Steve V

    Keeping and cultivating the feelings of thankfulness, appreciation and patience allows our heart to be in position to receive the awareness in mind the nature of the core of ourselves. Realizing such qualities that we are upright, devoted, large, creative, integrated beings here to give meaningful life value to our world.


  4. Ricardo B.

    I can only say that as I’ve allowed this radical shift in identity to deepen within myself, the experience of life has taken increasingly greater magical overtones. Whatever the resistance that exists in human nature to allow a natural flow to self-identity with spirit, it sure does require a consistent level of trust and belief that this is really the real way so that you can relax into that process. Of course, we all sense this in one way or another, but to really let yourself go there I feel is a different matter altogether.

    Placing the identity outside of yourself is quite dangerous because it can completely absorb your identity which then your whole mental and emotional state becomes transfixed by how you read others are relating to you. There’s no inner weight nor anchor to provide a pole to connect meaningfully to the world around you. You see this happening all the time as friends and family begin to expect you to act in ways that you may have always acted before, and sometimes even strangely enough, demanding it. It ends up creating a lot of unnecessary tension.

    Ultimately, this shift of identity yields greater and greater freedoms; a freedom to more fully explore the world and your expanded role in it. By demonstrating it in your own life, you then offer up that evidence to others that they too have the ability to experience freedom’s perfectly natural and balanced rhythms and perhaps join in on the excitement!


  5. Isabelle

    From children, we are taught that our happiness comes from without – money, relationships, success, power. However, faith in each of these creates an empty shell of a human being that will ultimately implode. Our value comes from within out – and as we constantly refine the meditations of our heart and mind, we will come to understand this more fully.


  6. Coco

    The love you speak about seems such a paradox. It is the most exclusive of relationships,as it develops the communion between your inner and outer selves. At the same time you realize that it is actually the most inclusive. The realty is, it connects you to the infinite. You care for people in ways you didn’t know was possible and realize the power of your own contribution to their lives and theirs to yours. William Shakespeare described it when he wrote “To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.


  7. Troy

    Beautiful words that will allow for the relationships that matter to become the expression into the world that try are designed to be. The value of that sacred understanding if passed on to our children through our examples can and will restore our world back to its true “core of being”. Thanks!


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