“Nothing is so mistaken as the supposition that a person is to extricate himself from a difficulty by intrigue, by chicanery, by dissimulation, by trimming, by an untruth, by an injustice. This increases the difficulties tenfold; and those who pursue these methods get themselves so involved at length that they can turn no way by their infamy becomes more exposed.” – Thomas Jefferson
While meditating on the implications of my recent post on Generative Living, it occurred to me that many cycles which would have otherwise led to the correction of a deviation or the overcoming of a difficulty are aborted because of a common, but devastating habit. This habit – trying to extricate oneself from a difficulty by intrigue, chicanery, dissimulation, trimming, untruth or injustice – short-circuits the cycle of regeneration in its earliest phases.
Failure on this point means that the person does not move from recognizing the need for change to the next crucial point: taking the need to heart. Instead of taking the matter to heart, the person instead directs all his energies to making it look as though someone or something else was responsible for making the change so obviously needed.
The more effective, honorable and therefore more manly, or womanly approach, is to take the recognized need swiftly and graciously to heart. With the matter thus contained in the safe harbor of the womb of the heart, it can be pondered, free of the obfuscating influences of blame, accusation and denial.
This, dear friends, is the atmosphere in which true repentance is born.
Gregory Hake 
Many people believe that they can avoid the shameful feeling of having another discover a shortcoming by hiding the truth of the matter. Yet it is so much more shameful to know that you are living with a shortcoming that you had the opportunity to overcome and did not. The temporary relief of someone “not finding out”, is not sufficient to overcome the pain of the thing that you must now live with. These are the things that build over time and destroy potential and eventually life itself.
It is so much better to initially repent, when the thing is small. You can then live a life free of shame, and not carry the unnecessary weight that so many carry on their shoulders.
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This post is so helpful as it offers a much needed introspect into repentance. This is a process that goes much deeper than saying “I’m sorry”. The cues offered to those who care are meticulously outlined, giving me personally more and specific ways to measure my process and revealing those so devastating habits of deflection, blame, etc.. The word “contained” within the safe harbor of the heart is key, as there is a great need here for real repentance and changes to be made. So often, things are taken to heart, but without the containment and safe harbor surrounding the process, it becomes diluted and then aborted due to the destructive influences allowed to enter the center. I will ponder this in greater levels as it relates to so many processes of creation above and beyond what this post even reflects. Thank you.
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What a blessing your words are Gregg, they call for the development of true character. I delighted as well in all the replys because they give evidence of character. Anytime blame, accusation or denial becomes a part of our expression it should be like a red flag calling us immediately to redirect, redirect!!
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It’s not so hard to repent when you keep your purpose at the fore as you mentioned a few weeks ago Gregg. It makes the process of repentance one to be met with eagerness each day so that any corrections that need to be made are made. To be rid of an identity that has been firmly anchored in falsehood is a liberating thought. To move past thought to actuality is what you’ve been encouraging with this blog. It takes an honesty with oneself and a desire to be move forward so actions begin to reflect a different state of being.
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Interesting to also acknowledge the vital role our conscious mind plays in choosing to keep our hearts a safe harbor to consider matters that have a depth of feeling.
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In this habit that you have brought to light, so much time can be wasted on trying to make oneself look good on the outside while leaving the inside stunted and in the dark. It is so much better (and easier for all involved) to be honest, forthright and willing to take responsibility for our actions and deeds deep within our heart. This is the earmark of a true leader.
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Sometimes it is said that the truth hurts. It may seem so as something is being highlighted for change Blame and denial may serve to deflect this discomfort temporarily while actually compounding the original difficulty. Experience will tell that it is actually less painful to use energy to make a change rather than to avoid one. As you put it – graciously and swiftly.
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I think the main reason this habit gets started is that as children they think they’ve gotten away with something. Perhaps they were able to shift the blame or confuse the situation to a point where the details were not examined. The point being it wasn’t understood there is always a price to pay; there is a score keeper. Ultimately we have to understand that we each are accountable for our transgressions and only a completed repentance can begin to change the habits of degeneratation to ones of creation.
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Self-sabotage is a baffling and blinding state, but if one is truly seeking the way out of it they need not look further than this post! Your description of the “womb of the heart” is a place each individual ultimately can tend only for himself or herself. But oh my gosh how thankful I am for your words and insights through this blog that offer the keys and encouragement to take the responsibility for tending to that womb!
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