When you welcome someone new into your world, be it at work, home or at play, you have the option as to which impressions you weight most heavily. It is often assumed that this process of “sizing up” is automatic, but in reality it is nothing more than a habit developed over time, out of self-preservation or self-promotion.

The way you prioritize these impressions will tell you a lot about the way you view yourself. Those who tend to weight the negative impressions most heavily likely have not come to terms with their own true, inner value. Whether they suffer from low self-esteem or have an inflated sense of self matters little, for both tend to view the world around them through a distorted lens. The former tend to do so more out of self-preservation, while the latter tend to do so for reasons of self-promotion.

Instead of sizing others up, look instead to identify the wonderful qualities in them. These qualities might either be in full flower or in seed form. In either case, honor those you meet with a generous and welcoming spirit. While you’re at it, do the same for people you’ve known for years. You might be surprised by what you see!