“A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think aloud. I am arrived at last in the presence of a man so real and equal, that I may drop even those undermost garments of dissimulation, courtesy, and second thought, which men never put off, and may deal with him with the simplicity and wholeness with which one chemical atom meets another.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Far and few between are those of whom it could be safely said “there is a man who is free of dissimulation, courtesy and second thought.” I would venture to say that such men are not the product of our educational system, rather, they rise to such preeminence because of their dedication to a higher standard in living, regardless of their background, education or profession.
Rather than floating along in the currents of thought and feeling which course through the mind and heart of man in any given era, such men prefer to live an examined life, hewing to eternal truths while others content themselves with transient memes. It is thus that a man might live “in the world” without being “of the world.” It is, my dear readers, the only way that we can be considered true friends.
Gregory Hake 
I think that many people see friendship merely as finding a person who you can coexist with without too much trouble. They don’t challenge you too much, they don’t annoy you too much, and most importantly the relationship never goes too far beyond the surface level.
There is so much more available than this. When you find a true friend, you find a relationship where limits are mutually pushed, allowing each person to make more progress than they were capable of by themselves.
It is easy to find true friends. Start pushing yourself and holding yourself to a higher standard, and your true friends will be pulled inexorably toward you.
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The alchemy of life of is simple and whole looking to create greater simplicity and wholeness. Your words point to engage in the ascending process of life and the greater union among us all.
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To be a friend, one must be stable and sure enough in one’s own being that an unstructured space may be held for another, free of judgment and reactiveness. Given the deceptive and confused conditions in the world, perhaps a degree of misunderstanding is to be expected, but how that misunderstanding is received and treated says so much, again, about one who would be a friend. Wonderful food for meditation today and always!
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It’s kind of strange to think about how people over the years have made and then collectively agreed and accepted a certain world system, much of which is embedded with various bigotries and prejudices which do not favor the whole. Why do we hurt each other? Is it just the slow rise from bestial origins as some think or is it a deep trans-generational scar in the psyche of man which has yet to heal, disfiguring a higher nature as others propose? Either way, we cannot come to really know ourselves or each other as we let the masks of this world order obscure our identities. We will continue in our injuries.
friendships are there, yes, and we get a glimpse of something miraculous within us, but the full splendor does not steadily shine unless the light of truth illuminates all. This slowly would melt away any allegiance of a dissimilar nature, perhaps even quickly. Pressures always develop as different sets of mental and emotional energy enter into competition and for a person to maintain their sanity, there can be only one victor. We all know the feeling of being torn, and the longer that lasts the more miserable we become! Choose we must, amidst a strong collective subconscious pull.
I take that to be “not of the world”, and certainly appreciate yours and Emerson’s contribution to this age old dilemma. Pretenses, with all of its defenses, finally can be dropped and we can be free. Stripped away from it’s religious overtones, it becomes very much real.
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This friendship would only be possible between two people that had relegated judgement as not worthy of them. An understanding and trust of the principles of creation would be their compass for relating to each other. Sounds wonderful! Political correctness be gone!! Jealousy, envy and competition would have no foothold. What a joy to each other and what would be possible when their creative spark met with the purity of the air they surrounded it with! Inspiring post. Thank you.
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This type of relatedness is unfortunately rare. Thank you for holding a place for it!
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Great post, thanks!
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