“The Ass and his Purchaser” by Aesop

A man wished to purchase an Ass, and agreed with its owner that he should try out the animal before he bought him. He took the Ass home and put him in the straw-yard with his other Asses, upon which the new animal left all the others and at once joined the one that was most idle and the greatest eater of them all. Seeing this, the man put a halter on him and led him back to his owner. On being asked how, in so short a time, he could have made a trial of him, he answered, “I do not need a trial; I know that he will be just the same as the one he chose for his companion.

A man is known by the company he keeps.

Born a slave in 620 BC and a contemporary of Solon, Aesop recorded many fables that have danced their way through the minds of men and the pages of history for centuries.  This particular fable is one that piqued my interest as a teenager during a French literature class in which we were comparing Aesop’s fables with the works of the French poet, Jean de la Fontaine.

A man is known by the company he keeps.  It’s hard to argue with that one, isn’t it?  What is the nature of the company you keep?  Are they honorable, kind and generous?  Are they leaders, go-givers, courageous and bright?  Those who surround you provide a magnifying glass through which you are known and a prism out of which your life expression refracts.

By this I am not implying that it is wise or necessary to cull or reformat your friendships arbitrarily, rather, the reflection you see can serve as an indicator of the nature or perhaps better put, the orientation and quality of your expression.  As when peering into a mirror, the changes to be made are almost always in you and not in the reflection of you. 

If you want to be a better person, you must start with you.  Ask yourself, “what lies in the center of my concern?”  Or, “what do I think about most?”  This will point you in the direction of the fountain from which your life surges.  If you are centered in that which you wish you had, rather than that which is presently under your command, if you prefer to focus on regrets about the past instead of celebrating today’s gifts or if you catch yourself complaining and nitpicking more than appreciating and encouraging, then you have your work cut out for you.

The internal changes you make cause something new to emanate from you.  The little changes in your words, your actions or perhaps something involuntary like more spark in your eye will be noticed by those around you.  Some will like it, some will not, but generally speaking, all will notice it. 

Those who are attracted to your newly refined expression will come closer and those who dislike the fact that you are raising your personal bar will be repelled. 

The process of reordering is automatic.  You needn’t pad your world with people based on judgments about them, in fact, you can do the internal work and watch and enjoy as those around you sort themselves out.

 A man is known by the company he keeps.