“The individual can attain self-control in great things only through self-control in little things. He must study himself to discover what is the weak point in his armor, what is the element within him that ever keeps him from his fullest success. This is the characteristic upon which he should begin his exercise in self-control. Is it selfishness, vanity, cowardice, morbidness, temper, laziness, worry, mind-wandering, lack of purpose?— whatever form human weakness assume in the masquerade of life he must discover. He must then live each day as if his whole existence were telescoped down to the single day before him. With no useless regret for the past, no useless worry for the future, he should live that day as if it were his only day,—the only day left for him to assert all that is best in him, the only day left for him to conquer all that is worst in him. He should master the weak element within him at each slight manifestation from moment to moment. Each moment then must be a victory for it or for him. Will he be King, or will he be slave?— the answer rests with him.” ~ William George Jordan
You hardly need a therapist to point out your weaknesses…the world around you probably does a pretty good job in drawing into relief those stunted areas of your character development. The challenge is not so much in identifying them, it rests primarily in dealing with them.
I’ve pointed out on numerous other occasions that self-improvement is initiated internally and eventually manifests externally. An internal change in orientation precedes the external change in function or capability. To shift from laziness to industriousness, for example, you must resolve in heart and mind to let the change occur within you before you can set about making the necessary adjustments. All character is developed and refined on this basis.
If you try to approach character development from the outside-in, you will not likely get very far. The internal shift facilitates a new alignment amongst your body, mind and heart, which in turn releases the power necessary to make the change. If you make the change on the outside or on the surface, say, in appearance or behavior, the returning pressure wave is likely to overwhelm your defenses. Make the change from the inside-out, however, and you can easily out-pressure the pressure you will likely feel post-change to go back to the old, comfortable way of being.
All of this is much more easily accomplished if you learn to stay focused on the task at hand. It’s easy to become distracted by both the past and the future, through regret and worry respectively, but when you center on the present moment you maximize your effectiveness in living.
Regret and worry subluxate your body-mind-heart connection. As a result, the power that would flow smoothly through you in relation to the issue at hand is dissipated. When the power is reduced, the scales tip from Kingship to slavery and you quickly become subject to rather than ruler over your field of responsibility.
You inherited your throne at birth, but whether or not you don your crown and accept your title is up to you. The choices you make from moment to moment either reaffirm your rulership or empower the weak elements within you.
And remember: the choice is yours!
Gregory Hake 
Great timing, thanks!
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Thank you James and good morning!
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The idea that you should treat this day as if your entire life was telescoped into it is amazing. I think this idea by itself is a nicely wrapped package of the self-pressure that you need to make any meaningful change. If today was your only day, would you even possibly think that making a change was too hard? I don’t think I would.
Having the self control to make a change and maintain a change is something that every successful person can accomplish. Today’s post is a great key on how to make that happen. You don’t need a therapist, you don’t need excuses, you just need to commit to the change and you will be able to maintain it.
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Today, I will challenge myself to do things differently. This Monday’s schedule is similar to many Mondays before, but it doesn’t have to end up like them in terms of the routines I have used. It sure does take focus, and no wonder there is an alarmingly high incidence of disorders of attention today. Multiple things compete for our energies in this modern world of ours and end up controlling us if we don’t exert focus and determined self-control. We can become like puppets on a string, pulled in many different directions and ultimately our energies are consumed in the process – nothing left to create with.
For the start of the school year, this message is of utmost importance! For students and for everyone else who aspires to greater living!
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When we make an internal shift, I’ve noticed there usually follows rather quickly an opportunity to confirm if in some outer sense. Once confirmed, the new alignment is strengthened and we move from there.
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Thanks for emphasizing the matter of choice. I know what mine is!
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An escape artist sees weaknesses in his or her mechanism of incarceration and focuses on those weaknesses to find a way out. So often, however, people in general fail to recognize the same principle when it comes to their lives. They focus their attention woefully on those solid walls or iron doors but fail to see the weak points where the cage could potentially be sprung!
Even in a very limited situation there are always starting points, areas where one may begin to live with vibrancy and effectiveness. When this is the focus, it is amazing how seemingly solid walls can either crumble or prove to be less ominous than they had seemed. As you emphasize, we have choices and options, beginning with our own internal landscapes, choices that will ultimately define our lives in terms either of slavery or mastery.
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These posts are so constructive, thanks for your efforts. Most people can recite chapter and verse what is wrong with them, how to change it is the mystery. The idea that it has to be addressed internally makes sense. Keep the process of change to yourself, as some may try to sabotage your efforts due to the weaknesses in themselves. If lasting change is the goal we are fully equipped to do that on our own. If the weakness is that glaring, as it seems most are, others will notice in time. Sometimes it’s only a passing realization that something is different about you. Also years later there may be those who will still charge you with the former weakness but the deep satisfaction that comes with change can’t be thwarted by ancient history.
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This post so magically backs the recent conversations in my home. A new school year is beginning and my husband and I have been helping my 12 year old daughter to take a look at ways she can create a better world around herself relative to her friends. Middle school must be time in life where we either make or break what will be our central character, a proving ground of sorts. Jordans opening sentence match our conversation tone as we explained how she handles the simple boundaries we set now determines her attitudes towardslarger boundaries in the future. It was hard for her to believe that disregarding her cell phone curfew over and over again could cost her her life in the future, when we ask her not to text and drive. The same consequences hold true for all of us, as a trainer, I see these principles onsmaller scales at out everyday when trying to help clients can control over their Heath and fitness. Do you have what it takes to push back from the table as they set out your favorite desert? I have been very lucky to be able to use this small environment to check myself as well, and here it is very easy to see where there are areas to be shored up. Thank you for being so timely with your posts. Anyone raising children should hold tight to these posts as they are the closest things to directions we are ever going to get.
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